Well there’s a blog post title I never thought I’d write. It wasn’t long ago that I was saying about how much fitness meant to me and that I couldn’t imagine a life without my regular workouts, and yet here I am feeling somewhat different about it all.
A few weeks ago I blogged about why everyone needs a break from their workout regime and dieting habits, and I stand by what I said. In fact, I followed my own advice (maybe a little too well) and took a two-week break during my holiday to Mexico. I did a couple of little workouts whilst I was there, but nothing like my usual five-weekly strength and cardio HIIT sessions. I got back on the Saturday and planned to re-board the health wagon on the Monday, the same day I went back to work. The pre-holiday me wouldn’t have let anything stand in my way, but this time I couldn’t bring myself to go. You’d think after a long and indulgent all-inclusive holiday that I’d be dying to get straight back in the gym and sweat out the pancakes, cocktails and nachos! Apparently not.
One week post holiday came around and I literally forced myself to go to the gym before work on the Monday. I was alright once I was there, but dragging myself out of bed before 6am was the absolute worst. I’ve never felt dread like it. Our next planned gym session came around on the Wednesday and instead of getting up and taking my butt to the gym, I slept through not one, but five alarms. Lazy or just bored of my routine? Probably both. It’s now three weeks post holiday and I’m still struggling. I did three twenty-minute home workouts during the week, yesterday I was too hungover to do anything (also unlike me) and today, well, I’ll probably go in a bit but I won’t lie – I’m not feeling it.
I don’t know what it is but I really have lost all motivation. I still want to be fit and strong and I can’t stand the thought of going back to my old unhealthy ways, but now I know I don’t need to be in a bikini in ‘x’ amount of weeks, I don’t feel that level of drive that I had prior to our holiday. Part of it is down to post-holiday blues, a career change and well, just sheer laziness, but I think it’s also because I seriously overdid it for nine months. It’s like if you eat a food too often and then eventually, the thought of it makes you feel sick. This really just goes to show that pushing yourself consistently week on week without a break really isn’t a good idea. In hindsight I regret not taking some time out, but I know that back then I wasn’t mentally strong enough to realise this. I would have kicked myself for taking even a day off in case I didn’t look good enough on holiday.
So yeah, that’s where I’m at with fitness. I think that once I’m really settled in my new job, it has only been one week after all, then I’ll be able to get back into the swing of things. If I’m not motivated when working for a huge fitness company then I really do have no hope, do I?! No in all seriousness fitness will always be something that I love deep down, this ‘phase’ is just lasting a bit longer than expected I guess. I could have easily picked up where I left off, but now I’ve left it too long and I don’t know what to do with myself. I need another form of motivation and despite having a holiday in a few weeks, it’s not a bikini one. In fact it’s more of an eating one if anything, because ‘when in Rome’ and all that. Really I guess that should be motivation, three weeks of hard work so I can eat all the pizza, pasta and gelato guilt-free!
I love writing a positive blog post, but sometimes you just need to be real about a situation. I’m conscious of having been quiet when it comes to diet and fitness lately, so I wanted to explain why, and I wanted to stress that it’s perfectly ok to have a bit of a wobble and lose your head slightly (how Love Island do I sound right now?). Sh*t happens and it’s never too late to try again. I’m sure as hell not going to throw away nine months of blood, sweat, tears and serious effort just like that!