Why is it that we struggle so much with living in the moment? For as long as I can remember – my whole year, month, week and even day is always spent leading up to something. Whether it’s a holiday, a wedding or another random event we’ve got planned – we lead our lives in anticipation for “the next big thing”. As a child, all I wanted was to get to the summer holidays. As a teenager, all I wanted to do was leave school and find my feet in life. And as an adult, all I want to do is travel the world and find new projects to begin, inside and outside of work. My dad always said to me “don’t wish your life away, you’ll only look back and regret it.” And he was totally right, yet I still find myself doing it.
It’s a Tuesday evening and here I am, sat writing this post, thinking about nothing other than the dark, autumn evenings that’ll soon be upon us – and how I cannot wait to curl up in a jumper with a Pumpkin Spiced Latte in hand after a long, cosy walk in the crisp wintry air. So Tumblr, I know, but it’s what it makes me happy – and it’s another thing for me to look forward to. It’s not even as if I don’t have enough to look forward to with our new apartment and holiday approaching, it’s simply that I crave that butterflies-in-my-stomach type of excitement. My body is currently sat in August, but my mind is more often than not wandering somewhere between October and December. I kid you not, I’ve already run Christmas, my 21st Birthday and New Year’s Eve through my head multiple times to the point where I’ve even planned our Christmas morning breakfast – which sounds extreme I know, but it’s our first Christmas living together and I’m not going to waste a minute of it.
I’ve been thinking a lot over the past few days about how “wishing your life away” is portrayed to be such a negative thing. Don’t get me wrong, we really should be making the most of each and every day, but I’ve come to realise we’re hugely missing the point here. It’s not the event itself we’re looking back on regretfully, it’s the emotions we feel leading up to it. So fear not, I’m not going to preach away about how you should live for today, because quite frankly that’s up to you and I know damn well that more often than not I won’t follow my own advice, but what I am going to tell you is that we really should be embracing that feeling of excitement more often. It’s all very well saying “oh my god, will next month just hurry up, I’m too excited”, but are you making the most of that feeling? It’s so important not to take it for granted, because soon enough the excitement you felt for that upcoming event will be a very distant and archived memory.
So, let’s take a minute to appreciate how we feel right now. For me, I can’t wait to move out and start the next chapter of my life with Darryl, but for the next two months I’m going to fully appreciate living at home with this huge emotion-filled knot in my stomach, because it’s actually a really content feeling that I know I’ll miss. It’s all very well me setting my sights on getting those keys and therefore wishing these next two months away, but instead I’m now thinking “holy crap Katie, in two months you’ll be packing up and leaving home for good. Let’s just make the most of this shall we?”.
If your average day consists of the same repetitive structure – then, like me, you live and breathe for those times that make you want to burst with nerves and happiness at the same time. But sadly life’s too short, so it’s crucial that we enjoy these emotions whilst we’re still able to fully embrace them.
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