Whilst being a perfectionist has its positives, sometimes – it can have the opposite effect. I’ve read countless posts about how bloggers spend hours and hours shooting, writing and scheduling – only to delete everything and start from scratch. I used to think what a waste of time that was. But now, whilst it still is essentially lost time, I see exactly why people do it – and I am a victim of it myself.
For me, being a perfectionist is a result of having limited confidence – which means that during the creation of every single post, I’m constantly criticizing myself in one way or another. As I’m sure many people will agree, school and college contributed massively in testing my confidence levels. I’d spend every hour of my time there, wishing I was the social butterfly who could just float about chatting to everyone and anyone. In fact, it was quite the opposite – and naturally this took its toll on my self-esteem.
Fortunately, over the years my confidence has improved – and it’s all down to working. It’s amazing how having a job in a customer facing environment literally forces you to discover this somewhat fearless side of your personality that you didn’t know existed. Though what I’ve come to realise, is that this isn’t solely self-confidence I’m developing, it’s actually ‘life’-confidence. You have to have so much ‘life’-confidence just to get by, but self-confidence is something you build on your own – with the help of those around you.
So, why did I decide to put my whole life out on the internet when I’m lacking confidence? I don’t know. All I know, is that I hoped it would lead to success one day – because success gives me confidence. Who knows, maybe that’ll happen – maybe it won’t. But regardless, my confidence is already improving. One blog related compliment genuinely uplifts my spirit for the entire week. But on the other hand, one negative comment has the potential to destroy any self-confidence progress I’d made. It’s a harsh world out there, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take!
Seeing images on other blogs that scream perfection is usually what causes my mind to set itself to panic mode, and I instantly question why I’m even doing this ‘blogging’ thing. Why do my clothes suck? Why aren’t I photogenic like these other girls? Why can’t I afford a better camera to help with the image quality? It’s ridiculous. I blog because I genuinely enjoy every aspect of it, but with my heart being set on blogging for a living one day – the pressure is continuously rising to make sure that my content is pristine at all times.
This being said, I’ve actually become more aware of the fact in recent weeks that not all blogs that are successful – are perfect. Don’t get me wrong, some of the best blogs in the world are faultless – but others aren’t, yet they have reached the exact same level of success, but most importantly – are happy. Whilst it’s great that a blogger can make sure their posts are as flawless as they can be, it’s crucial not to lose sight of what’s ‘real’. In short, achieving a good amount of self-confidence and perfection isn’t something that unveils overnight – it takes hard work, determination and a smidge of failure before you hit the jack pot, and that goes for everything in life.